Congratulations on your engagement! If you are full of excitement and not sure where to start, this post is for you. There are so many possibilities ahead. Here’s a roadmap of steps you can take to begin planning your wedding and navigating this new chapter.
1. Celebrate the Moment
Before diving into the logistics, take a moment to savor your engagement. Celebrate together—whether that’s a champagne toast, a weekend getaway, or sharing the news with close family and friends. This period is about celebrating that you are building a life together and enjoying the excitement of what’s to come.
2. Announce Your Engagement
You may already have a few people in mind who you want to tell first. Once those initial conversations are done, you can start spreading the word more broadly. Some people prefer to make an official announcement on social media, while others like to share the news personally or via phone calls. It’s your moment, so share it however feels right for you both.
3. Set a Date (or Decide on a Timeline)
This is often one of the first major decisions couples make. Some people know right away when they want to get married, while others prefer a longer engagement to plan. Think about factors like:
- Season: Do you have a preference for a certain time of year? Some seasons might suit your vision better (summer in the mountains, fall for an outdoor wedding, or winter for a cozy vibe).
- Logistics: Consider family schedules, venues, and availability when setting a date.
- Personal Significance: You might want to tie it to a date that’s meaningful to you both, like the anniversary of when you first met.
If you’re unsure about a date, a general timeline of when you’d like to get married can help narrow down other decisions, like when to start booking venues. Some venues book over a year in advance. It can be best to have a few dates in mind when you start reaching out to venues.
4. Investment and Budgeting
Investing in your wedding is one of the most important, yet sometimes stressful, parts of wedding planning. Communication is key as well as deciding on your priorities.
Weddings are becoming more and most personal and less traditional. Don’t feel like you have to do anything. Maybe you don’t want a cake. Maybe you do want a thousand peonies.
When my husband and I got married we decided to have a very intimate wedding and then a big party on a later date. You have to do what feels right for you.
5. Create a Guest List
The guest list will be central to many of your decisions—venue size, catering, and even the overall vibe of your wedding. Start by listing the people you both want to invite. This list will likely evolve, but starting with an initial list helps you gauge your wedding’s scale and style. Consider:
- Family: Will you have a small, intimate gathering or a larger celebration with extended family?
- Friends: Who are the people you can’t imagine celebrating without?
- Work and acquaintances: Depending on your wedding size, you might include colleagues and other members of your community.
6. Choose a Wedding Style or Theme
Think about the kind of wedding you envision. Do you want a traditional affair, or something more modern or unconventional? Some couples choose a theme—like vintage, bohemian, or rustic—that influences everything from decor to the dress code. This decision also impacts your venue choice. For example, a beach wedding might call for a different vibe compared to an elegant ballroom.
7. Start Researching Venues
The venue is one of the first and most crucial elements to book, especially if you have a specific date in mind. Venues often book up well in advance, so once you have a rough idea of your wedding date, start visiting venues. Consider factors like:
- Location: Is it convenient for most of your guests? Will it reflect your wedding style?
- Capacity: Can the venue comfortably accommodate your guest list?
- Amenities: Does it offer catering, decoration options, or an in-house coordinator, or will you need to bring your own vendors?
- Weather Plan: Does the venue have a good back-up option if weather requires you to bring an outdoor event indoors.
This step can set the tone for your entire event, so take your time to find a place that feels special to you both.
8. Hire Key Vendors
Once you’ve locked in your venue, it’s time to start thinking about the professionals who will help bring your vision to life. Vendors who must reserve your day should be booked first. These might include:
- Photographer/Videographer: Capturing memories is crucial, so take your time to find a photographer whose style matches your vision.
- Caterer: If your venue doesn’t provide food, look into catering options that align with the atmosphere you want to create.
- Florist: Flowers play a big role in setting the mood. Choose a florist who can execute your color palette and floral vision.
- Officiant: If you’re having a religious ceremony, you may already have an officiant in mind. For a secular ceremony, consider a professional celebrant who can personalize your vows and ceremony structure. It is becoming increasingly popular to have a friend or family member officiate. Colorado has pretty simple regulations to officiate a wedding. Every state is different.
9. Personal Touches
Consider ways to infuse your personalities into the celebration. This might include:
- Vows: Writing your own vows adds a personal and heartfelt touch to the ceremony. Private vows during the first look have become a popular trend. (A first look is when a couple decides to see each other before the ceremony. There are many benefits to planning this way.)
- Guest Favors: Something small but meaningful, like homemade treats, keepsakes, or personalized items, can be nice options.
- Music Playlist: Whether it’s a live band or a DJ, your song selections will create the mood for your celebration. Most couples will at least plan a few songs for a “must play list” and a “do not play list.”
- Traditions: There are so many ways to share traditions, whether they are cultural, religious or something important to your family. Events like breaking the class, a Chinese tea ceremony or including a special song or reading are beautiful additions to a wedding day. Or sometimes having a story, an item or food to share or display at the reception can be a wonderful personal touch. I’ve seen some really fun displays for pets at a reception, since they couldn’t be there on the wedding day.
- Special people: It is tradition to have a father walk his daughter down the aisle, but I have seen some beautiful ceremonies honor all the parents. A mother and father will walk down the aisle with the groom and then a mother and father will walk the bride down the aisle. A reading at the ceremony, a welcome message or a toast at the reception is also a special way to honor family or a friend.
10. Stay Organized: Wedding Website, Engagement Photos, Save the Dates
With so many details to manage, organization is important. Use tools like wedding planning apps, spreadsheets, or journals to track your ideas, appointments, and deadlines. Setting small milestones will help keep things on track without feeling overwhelmed.
After you plan your date and venue I recommend taking some engagement portraits to celebrate and to use for your save the date and wedding website. Check out some engagement photo ideas here.
Most couples create a wedding website with day of information, accommodations, FAQs, and registry information that can be updated.
There are no hard rules, but on average, couples send save the dates 6 months before the wedding. For a destination wedding or holiday weekend wedding, mail save the dates 8 to 12 months in advance.
Final Tip: Breathe and Enjoy
Wedding planning can get intense, but remember it’s about the two of you and celebrating your love. Don’t lose sight of what really matters: your commitment to each other. Delegate where possible, lean on friends and family when needed, and above all, enjoy the process.
From here, you’ll continue making decisions together, but these first steps will help you both start your journey with a solid foundation. Best of luck with everything ahead!
Looking for some wedding inspiration?
Here are some of my favorite venues in Colorado:
The Manor House, Littleton
Blackstone Rivers Ranch, Idaho Springs
Arrowhead Golf Club
Shupe Homestead, Longmont
Grant Humphrey’s Mansion, Denver
Cherokee Ranch and Castle, Sedalia
Spruce Mountain Ranch
Red Rocks
Della Terra, Estes Park
Also be sure to check out: Denver Botanic Gardens, Camp Hale, Piney River Ranch, Lyons Farmette, The Oaks at Plum Creek, and Flying Horse Ranch.
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